BEHAVIOUR MANAGEMENT                                                                February 2010

 

Children need:-

* a caring and supportive environment

* consistent handling with a predictable daily structure

* someone to listen to them - their worries and fears as well as their joys and excitements

Misbehaviour needs to be handled with a united and consistent approach between parents and carers and agreement must be reached between us on this issue when it arises.

Management of behaviour should be positive.

It is not very helpful only to tell a child what not to do; it is more helpful to tell a child what you do want them to do.

Praise and approval encourage children to want to please and co-operate.

Children need help to cope with feelings of anger and loss of control and to understand these feelings are normal.

If behaviour is unacceptable, the behaviour must be criticised and not the child.

Children feel most secure when the boundaries set on their behaviour are made clear to them and rules are applied consistently and explained.

Behaviour management is essential for reasons of safety and social acceptance. It needs to be adapted for different ages and stages of development. Acceptable social behaviour is mainly learnt by following examples of others, so parents and carers must be positive role models. With babies, distraction is the favoured option. With toddlers, a firm 'no', distraction and explanation usually work quite well. Time out is used if necessary to minimise disruption and ensure the safety of others.

One must not give too much attention to misbehaviour as children cannot differentiate between quality and quantity of attention. Some children may misbehave because it is the only way they get attention and they would rather receive bad attention than none at all, which shows how important it is to give praise wherever possible and to give recognition of all personal achievements.

We will respect your wishes as parents and will discuss with you if we have had to manage any misbehaviour and how we have dealt with it.

We do not often experience temper tantrums with the children in our care - they tend to save these for their parents! When they do happen, it is important to be calm and reassuring and then move on.

House Rules

DO

Be kind to others

Share and take turns

Tell the truth

Help others

Treat everyone with respect

Be considerate

DON'T

Hurt anyone

Hurt anyone's feelings

Take toys from another child

Wherever possible, the children sit together at mealtimes and treat them as a social occasion. We encourage self-reliance, but assist as required. We expect all the children to stay at the table until everyone has finished. We discourage toys at the table as they are a distraction and get very messy, but a favourite toy can be placed nearby and is given back after the child has been wiped clean at the end of the meal. We actively encourage children to say please and thank you and be respectful of others. We try to set a good example ourselves. Corporal punishment is neither used nor threatened.

Being consistent is often difficult and tiring. There is some trial and error - particularly with our own children - and we don't always get it right. We are human too and have our off days like everybody else.

 

Wendy & Louis Bernardelle